The Ball 2006

The Ball prepares itself for kick off

This Sunday, May 28th 2006 in Battersea Park, London
Meet us @ 2pm at the Peace Pagoda on the river

So then, here we go again… it’s time to visit our Mount Olympus as we prepare for the epic overland journey to, er, Munich. Oh well, not quite the same epic as Seoul was last time or Cape Town will be next time, but hey, continuity is what it’s about this year. In the spirit of the low-key, low-effort* nature of this trip, we’re playing a kickabout on Sunday, May 28th at 2pm in Battersea Park.

(*since I wrote this Sky News have announced that they’re coming along to broadcast the kickoff LIVE on TV — *gulp* — not so low-key anymore then)

The Park

It may not be well organised, it may even end up as mob football, but we’ll be there all the same. Come along! Meet us at the pagoda by the river and help us make a spectacle of ourselves… bring along a dark and a light shirt so we can divide up into recognisable teams.

And as a reminder of what this is all about, I’ve included the 5 minute movie from 2002 below.

Nope, I’m not talking about spyware, malware, adware or anything destructive to your computer’s health here, just a selection of the funny, annoying, provocative and simply delightful football-related trivia that’s come my way recently… most of it, no doubt, gearing people up for the imminent (oh my gosh how imminent!) start of the World Cup in Germany.

To kick off then, a sweet reminder of (one of) our World Cup hosts from four years ago — the kitschy but utterly compelling Lovely Football from Japan’s Onitsuka Tiger National Choir. Okay, so it’s advertising a shoe, but just check out the sing-along video!

[display_podcast]

So, following on swiftly from national stereotypes to the stuff showcasing male stereotypes… I guess this proves that men can’t stop thinking about football — it’s a photo of “Amburg Wc Futbol club” from Flickr:

Uploaded by wweeggee on 31 Jan ’06, 9.59am GMT.

And then two timely pieces of advice — firstly, the “World Cup Rules for Women”, a memorandum (in HTML or PDF format) containing rules such as these:

1. From 9 June to 9 July 2006, you should read the sports section of the newspaper so that you are aware of what is going on regarding the World Cup, and that way you will be able to join in the conversations. If you fail to do this, then you will be looked at in a bad way, or you will be totally ignored. DO NOT complain about not receiving any attention.

2. During the World Cup, the television is mine, at all times, without any exceptions. If you even take a glimpse of the remote control, you will lose it (your eye).

3. If you have to pass by in front of the TV during a game, I don’t mind, as long as you do it crawling on the floor and without distracting me. If you decide to stand nude in front of the TV, make sure you put clothes on right after because if you catch a cold, I wont have time to take you to the doctor or look after you during the World Cup month.

Follow the links to the full document to read Rules 4 – 12. If you’re going to print it out and stick it to the fridge, I recommend the PDF — it’s designed to look like an offical FIFA document. Should make all the difference when confronted…

Secondly, if you do have to mingle with the fairer sex during matches, “How to explain the offside rule to a lady” (as it was politely titled when i received it) could help:

The Offside Rule explained for girls

You’re in a shoe shop, second in the queue for the till. Behind the shop assistant on the till is a pair of shoes which you have seen and which you must have.
The female shopper in front of you has seen them also and is eyeing them with desire.
Both of you have forgotten your purses.
It would be totally rude to push in front of the first woman if you had no money to pay for the shoes.
The shop assistant remains at the till waiting.
Your friend is trying on another pair of shoes at the back of the shop and sees your dilemma.
She prepares to throw her purse to you.
If she does so, you can catch the purse, then walk round the other shopper and buy the shoes.
At a pinch she could throw the purse ahead of the other shopper and, *whilst it is in flight* you could nip around the other shopper, catch the purse and buy the shoes.
Always remembering that until the purse has *actually been thrown* it would be plain wrong to be forward of the other shopper.
There you go poppet.

To which some wag added:

However if you were loitering by the till checking out the gift cards you are technically NOT INTEREFERING WITH PURCHASE and can be in that position when the ‘purse is thrown’. The purse must be allowed to fall to the floor before you can pick it up and buy the shoes though.

The Global Game sent me a timely reminder that there’s a very special football game going on today. It’s the second of two games that have been played consistently over the last 1000 years or so, and, to many, is the precursor to the modern game whose birth we celebrate at Battersea Park. The game, more commonly referred to as “mob football”, takes place on a pitch three miles long in Ashbourne, Derbyshire and is played over the course of eight hours by two teams; the Down’ards and the Up’ards. Yesterday’s game was won by the Down’ards with the only “goal” being scored by a certain Brendan Harwood. Actually, the talk is of “the ball being goaled” — the ball itself being made of cork and hand-painted. Ouch!

Ulrich Hesse-Lichtenberger notes that interest in this traditional game is still rife amongst modern football’s higher echelons. According to him, just before West Germany played the USSR in the 1966 World Cup semi-final, Adi Dassler (founder of the eponymous adidas) had paid a visit to Ashbourne. The Germans beat the USSR in a closely fought match, and…

There were smiles all around, but one of the broadest did not belong to a player. Adi Dassler had gone to Ashbourne in Derbyshire to investigate the traditional Shrove Tuesday football match and had dug up and age-old, mouldering football boot which he proudly took home to display in his semi-private museum. The worth of a trophy is always relative.

The BBC has a mini-site devoted to Ashbourne Shrovetide Football 2006 which is very informative and worth a look if you’re lucky enough to be able to go this year.Something I liked very much, and had no idea existed, was the The Shrovetide Anthem, which was written for a concert in 1891:

The Shrovetide Anthem

There’s a town still plays this glorious game
Tho’ tis but a little spot.
And year by year the contest’s fought
From the field that’s called Shaw Croft.
Then friend meets friend in friendly strife
The leather for to gain,
‘And they play the game right manfully,
In snow, sunshine or rain.

‘Tis a glorious game, deny it who can
That tries the pluck of an Englishman.

For loyal the Game shall ever be
No matter when or where,
And treat that Game as ought but the free,
Is more than the boldest dare.
Though the up’s and down’s of its chequered life
May the ball still ever roll,
Until by fair and gallant strife
We’ve reached the treasur’d goal.

‘Tis a glorious game, deny it who can
That tries the pluck of an Englishman.

Amen to that!

Fabinhno on Copacabana playing keep-up
(courtesy Brazil Uncovered)

I came across Brazil Uncovered, a fantastic little blog by Doug Banks and Dan Osborne, a couple of days ago, and I’ve been enchanted reading the stories of their adventures ever since. This is how they describe their motivation for the trip:

We’re making a pilgrimage to Brazil to re-ignite our faith in football and rediscover just what made us passionate about the game in the first place. We’ll go to watch the players who can take your breath away with magical skill, meet the fans and try to find out just why it is that Brazilians live and breathe the beautiful game.

And what a trip that must have been — they find football wherever they go, and they report on it with an enthusiasm that belies the cynicism about the game than they express in the statement quoted above. I’d be willing to bet that the many people who are increasingly jaded by the antics of the professional game here in England would benefit from reading Brazil Uncovered too.

The head of the German football federation warned that stationing tanks around the stadiums at this year’s World Cup finals would destroy the friendly atmosphere the organisers want to create.

No kidding, Sherlock! :)

Quoted from a Yahoo Sports News article.

It seems that FIFA are slowly cottoning on to our idea of an equivalent to the Olympic Torch for football. Two years ago, instead of being carried by athletes to the Olympic Games in Greece from, er, Greece, the torch made a tour of all the countries that had hosted the games. Well, this year, the World Cup trophy is being taken from country to country before it goes to Germany. It’s not just visiting the countries which have hosted the tournament, but the idea seems to be along the same lines…

For the first time in history, the inimitable FIFA World Cup Trophy will travel the globe in a whirlwind tour ahead of next summer’s festival of football. Neither the current trophy, designed and recently renovated by Italian sculptor and creator Silvio Gazzaniga, nor its predecessor the Jules Rimet Cup has ever before embarked on such an amazing journey.

Apparently there’s a 3D film that has been made to accompany the tour:

[The film,] exploring the almost mythical birth of the Trophy itself, will wow the audience with its tremendous effects and distilled football fever. From the heavens and molten beginnings, the Trophy emerges among the stars and is given a fictional ‘birth’ befitting its vaunted status in the real world.

Quotes come from the article The FIFA World Cup comes to the world on the FIFA website. No news on when it will reach London — but wouldn’t it be great if it coincided with the game in Battersea Park when The Ball begins its journey? The trophy will be in London on 23 March 2006, although no venue has been announced. The entire schedule can be found here

Use your loaf!

I always knew there was bread in football, but now there seems to be football in bread as well. Spotted this weekend in Hamburg.

Seems like the project that Sven Goran Eriksson and Nancy Dell’Olio founded in 2002 has finally got itself a website. On it, they say:

“No matter where you go in the world, the language of football speaks for itself, transcending class, age, religious and gender barriers. High in the mountains on distant desert plains, on paradise beaches or arctic wastes — if you don’t speak the language you can always talk football.”

Sounds familiar…

Check it out at www.truce.net

According to the Independent, in an article titled Olympic Flame Hijacked by Anti-Capitalist Protesters:

“Eleanora Berlanda, the Italian 1,500 metres champion runner, was pounding the streets of the northern city of Trent bearing the torch when eight protesters, their faces hidden by scarves, burst through barriers along her route and grabbed at it.”

Click here to read the full article on the Common Dreams website

Hmm, I wonder what adventures await us…

The ball that we kick to the Opening Ceremony of the World Cup is always the official World Cup ball for that tournament. If we’d had the idea in 1974, these are the balls we’d have been kicking:

1974: TELSTAR

According to FIFA, this was the first ball with 32 black and white panels to make it more visible on black and white television screens.

1978: TANGO

Supposedly a more design representing “elegance, dynamism and passion”!

1982: TANGO

This ball’s innovation was its waterproof design.

1986: AZTECA

The first synthetic match ball

1990: ETRUSCO

The first ball with an internal layer of foam

1994: QUESTRA

Designed to fly faster through the air

1998: TRICOLORE

The first multi-coloured ball

2002: FEVERNOVA

Radical restyling

2006: TEAMGEIST

Apparently this is the most accurate ball to date — the seams on the official ball (not the replica pictured here) are flush to the surface and should cause less air turbulence as it flys